I’m Courtnee. First and foremost, I am an artist. I talk a lot, write a lot, take pictures, screw with computers, and make stuff.
I grew up in Sacramento, spending most of my tortured adolescence online, on drugs, waiting for the next DEFCON.
I dropped out of high school to work at KFC and spend my paychecks on Nirvana bootlegs, soon to succumb to the allure of slackware.
I used to work at Microsoft, on early smart phones, and bounced around the 90’s dot com boom. Now, I am both unrecognizable, and self employed.
Vocations/Labors of Love
I am a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist® with The Grief Recovery Method®.
I obsessively create artwork, which has been displayed in both the Benaroya and McCaw halls of Seattle. I am a member of The Nonsense Society, an online publication showcasing undiscovered, independent artists.
I accept patronage to support my artwork through Patreon, an awesome new crowdfunding tool somewhat like kickstarter. Here is an example of the type of content those people get to see. (Translation: Please give me a dollar when I make cool shit so I can spend more of my life making cool shit).
Yes, I do commissions!
I served four years as the board president and creative director of Vita Arts, a 501(c)(3) non-profit I co-founded in 2009. Vita is still transforming lives through artistic expression with a new crew at the helm.
The Art of Living
Personal growth is an absolute core element of my survival. Some can call it in and be fine; I would not be alive today if I had done that.
As such, I place a lot of effort figuring out what’s really going on below — mostly me, sometimes you. I love supporting other artists’ experiential growth in the context of my performance direction, non-profit, and shows. I also love supporting people in their personal healing journeys by sharing what I have learned through mine.
I dig on psychology and geeking out on sociological trends. I am much more aware of my privileges, and how I utilize them, than I used to be. Currently, I am working through my place in our cultures of racism, rape, and figuring out how I want to feminism.
As an attempt survivor, I advocate for mental health and suicide prevention awareness, and write about my personal experience occasionally on my blog.
I have moments of pure bonding with people, even strangers and my readers, but choose to have very few truly close personal friends; even fewer as I change and grow. I highly value my acquaintances and extended community of countless social circles who embrace me warmly when I cycle through.
I can be kind and incredibly tactful, however I think incessant politeness is disingenuous and greatly overvalued. Compassion does not equate to niceness – in fact, many times, compassion is exactly the opposite of being ‘nice’.
I struggle to maintain balance between radical honesty and when to wait to cool down first, and am still working on learning to respect people I don’t agree with.
I periodically like to cuss, overshare, and tell it like it is. I like talking about poop. I like jokes utilizing cartoonish violence (die in a car fire!). Love Carlin. Hate Tosh.
I am an ambivert, high in imagination and assertiveness. Large social groups and parties drain me, unless I am performing, in which I often need days after to recover from.
I am also excruciatingly sensitive, and I pick up a lot from the world and the people in it. I have historically spent a lot of time in denial about that in order to get through the day. As I am coming into my own, that’s not so much my reality, anymore.
Tea makes me happy, especially while sipped in a bath, as does the impossibly soft bunnyfur on my awesome chirpy cat. I love the simplicity of really sitting with taking in a big breath of fresh air. Travel frees my soul, I do it as often as I can and am very fortunate to have friends who support this element of my life.
Fall is my favorite season. Yay, death.
In my ever-present quest to find home, both within myself and in the world, I am spending a year celibate and sober, and I am currently saving to build a tiny off-grid house on wheels. I am about to move into a friends shed as my final phase of leaning down and saving to build the house next summer.
Finding me online
I’ve been documenting my existence online since long before companies had urls or people called their online journals “blogs”.
At one time, (1995-2004) this website was called phuqed.org, and I spent most of my time complaining, lashing, and being afraid. I still do that, sometimes, but mostly other stuff, now.
I also ran one of the first webcams on the internet, but you’ve probably never heard of it.
My social networking tends to fluctuate whereas the existence of this website has remained constant.
These are my current websites:
http://courtneefallonrex.net – Visual Art
http://neevita.net – All-encompassed Art Site
http://blog.neevita.net – Diary and Art Blog <—– YOU ARE HERE
http://fakehair.net – Wigs and Hair pieces
http://artfultouch.info – My 5-star rated massage practice.
You are more powerful than what was done to you
- “Control Theory” by William Glasser
- “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle
- “Escaping Emotional Entrapment” – Daniel Rutley
- “The Courage to Trust” – Cynthia L. Wall, LCSW
- “Dance of Anger” – Harriet Lerner
These books helped me, undoubtedly. It is important to mention however, that no matter how intelligent and insightful, reading and intellectualizing alone cannot heal deep psychological wounds.
It was only when I began continuously applying this lesson, seeking experiential therapies and reconnecting with my body, that my subconscious began healing and my life blossomed.
Here are a few of the impactful experiences I’ve had which have supported me in my growth:
- The Landmark Forum. The structure around the excellent education is a cultish and aggressive pyramid scheme. If you can look past that, go for the empowering kick in the ass.
- The Grief Recovery Method. My experience with the book and exercises combined with sessions with a trained specialist continue to help me complete trauma in my life. I am also a certified specialist in the method.
- Vipassana Meditation. If you have plateaued in your growth or want to start at the deep end of felt-sense healing, I highly recommend it. Beware of the compassion baiting; Anger is a teacher, too.
- Nonvoilent Communication – life enriching communication skills to help you stay calm and compassionate even in the most trying circumstances. The process helps build your emotional vocabulary, and provides a framework so you can more clearly communicate your feelings, hopes, and what you want in ways that make it easier for others to hear you.
- Systemic Constellations – a healing modality, which combines felt sense, grief recovery, and human witness.
If you wanna talk with me, I can be contacted at firstname.lastname@example.org
Take care of you,
About the Author: Courtnee Fallon Rex
Courtnee is a cat-loving artist-musician mental-health-prosumer perpetually broke-open healer person living in the Seattle area. She thinks deeply, feels deeply and lives life on her own terms. You can support Courtnee and her work for as little as $1 a month via her Patreon campaign, pay to download her two studio albums, purchase her Live CD, purchase her artwork, purchase art prints, purchase something that will benefit her artwork, or donate to her Tiny House Fund through paypal below.